vacation days

The past three years we've had this amazing hook-up with a free beach-front condo. The kids keep asking when we're going and I miss the ocean so much I can smell it. It seems that planning our own vacation isn't in the cards or the budget. But it's summer and there are lots of adventures to discover right around us. So we take one day a week and we take our own little vacations. Today, for the first time ever we went to Lake Winnie, our town's very own amusement park. I'd never gone before because amusement parks weird me out a little. I think that scene from Pinocchio left me jaded as a kid. You know, the scene where all the gaudy, over-stimulation goes awry and suddenly all the boys are donkeys. Anyway,when I was little, my mom used to occasionally take us to Clemonton Park in New Jersey. I remember all the lights and sparkly plastic, the smell of chlorine and funnel cake, those were heavenly summer nights. So we went and the kids loved it and we enjoyed watching them take it all in. I loved sitting with my boy watching his eyes grow wide as our cart crested the peak of the ferris wheel just as the sun was going down. Ella informed me at the end of the evening that she would like to live there.





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and um

There is nothing like having a few kids to strengthen ones' resolve in the belief of total depravity. You discover very quickly from these angelic looking creatures that no one needs to teach them to lie, fight,hit or disobey. It comes very naturally. And at times you stare blankly at your husband across the table wondering how these horrid little misbehaving people came from you. In a sense, we are wired to be destructive to our own happiness and well-being and destructive in how we relate.
Kindness, self-control, generosity, truthfulness and a sense of justice are things that need to be modeled and taught. It's a harrowing responsibility, not so much the saying but the living part of it. I've been pondering how I can teach my children to be compassionate in a time when so many kids grow up thinking the world is centered around them. I'm looking forward to starting this book just given to me by my thoughtful mom-in-law. As parents, we spend hours of time and energy taking our kids to dance and sports and encouraging social, athletic, and academic success. It's good to pursue growth in these things but how much time do we spend teaching our kids to be mindful of the needs of others and how to serve? We are immensely blessed to have so much freedom and abundance and responsibility comes with that privilege. So I talk to Juden, mostly, as he is the most inquisitive, about what is going on in our world. He overhears the news, our prayers and my conversations anyway, why not try to put it on his level? I told him how in some countries followers of Jesus are not allowed to pray and worship freely. I tell him that in some places in the world there are children and mommies and daddies without enough to eat,things painful to see much less to live. But I also tell him about hope and that there are little ways to help. The interesting result has been his prayers. The boy loves to pray and his prayers especially before dinner go on and on with lots of, "and,um and um's" between requests. His prayers are simple and heartfelt and have, on more than one occasion, brought tears to my eyes. He prays for Nana's legs to walk without a cane, for all the children in the world to be healthy, for people not to get in trouble for praying,that people won't fight, that he can go to Mimi's pool and on and on, you get the picture. Then one night after a somewhat exasperated stream of "and um's" he said, "and um, I just can't stop loving you."

Sometimes, along the way, you start to see these little signs that the seeds that were planted are beginning to bloom. It's a beautiful thing and glimmer of God's love that I want to remember. I am seeing the Holy Spirit stirring inside my boy and it makes me so thankful. The other day I sat with Juden at the table as he slowly picked at his food, unusual for my ravenous boy. And then he said, " Mom, if I just eat a little of my breakfast can we send the rest of it to Wogayehu?" He has looked at his picture many times and prayed for him. Pictured is a small-framed Ethiopian boy. He is not smiling and his feet are breaking out of his torn shoes. He has no mother and father, lives with a grandmother and is one of the thousands of kids that depend on being sponsored in order to go to school and have enough food. I told Juden how kind that was and then explained that we couldn't box up his scrambled eggs and sausage and send it half way around the world. But we could send him some money, letters and our prayers. There are tangible ways we can get involved that can also help our kids become more mindful of those around them. Here are a just a few, Compassion, Mocha Club, Shoes for Orphan Souls. I'm thinking the last one will be particularly fun for my shoe-loving girls. You don't have to have lots of extra money to give, you just have to be open-handed with what God has given you. It's not based on momentary bleeding heart emotions, though admittedly for me those are often there. We give in love for the One who has given us everything we have including our very breath.
The other morning I paused on the trail I was running on to pray and instead of thinking about it too hard I thought of Juden's prayer and the sweet aroma it must have been to God. I wondered what my life would look like if that was the cry of my heart.
"Papa, I can't stop loving you."
And it was enough.

what the day holds

I love these long summer days of never knowing what the day will hold. We are stretching our days into the night so that maybe we can pull the reigns on summer and make her slow down a little. Here are few things that have made me smile lately:
the smell of linseed oil and paint as I watch him quietly work,


outside concerts with balloons and dancing kids and water ice,

downtown fountains all to ourselves,


pool days,watching stars,and playing on hay bales,


this song,

and this song that will make you smile and move.

how does your garden grow?

Whats for dinner? um, salad.



I need to do a little catch up in blogs. There have been a few things I wanted to record and no time to write. My first experience with growing food was a good one. We had more lettuce and spinach than we could possibly keep up with, sugar snap peas, green beans and a few herbs. The kids loved being part of the garden and it was so satisfying to have a large part of our dinners from what we'd grown. They loved snipping and washing to help me prepare supper. It is fascinating watching things grow from seed and the relationship God created between the earth and our bodies' need for sustenance. What I had not figured out was how to keep things growing in this southern heat. So last week the blazing heat squeezed much of the life out of what had been so lush. I ripped out much of it to the kids dismay, except the beans which like the heat and I'm working on some hot weather things like peppers and tomatoes and a pumpkin that should be ready in the Fall.

pink

Right in time for Ella's birthday I saw this lovely idea on Soule Mama of a personal little garden and I knew it would be perfect for Ella. She loves helping me garden and ever since Nana gave her a book called Pinkalicious she has loved all things pink. I planted a few things and got her a new little shovel and left the rest for her to plant Petunias, Impatiens, Verbena and a few others. She loved it and is so proud of her all pink garden.







I should probably just say that this particular weekend I went to Nashville to see Josh play, which was awesome but I was already a tired mama who had been almost at my wits end with a certain two year old who seemed to have a propensity toward pushing just the right buttons to push me to a breaking point. I wanted to handle every situation right but so often didn't. I woke up early after getting in bed at 3 to prepare a secret garden for the birthday girl on a day that was so hot it just wanted to melt your face off even at the crack of dawn. And all the other plants that were so lush were beginning to protest the consecutive days of dryness and heat and look all droopy. Then my over tired,hormonal self got into an argument with Josh that was over something stupid but still left me feeling hurt, misunderstood, defeated and mad at myself. And it was Father's day and all I wanted was to throw my arms around my own dad and smell that sawdust and after-shave smell. I wanted to show him my garden and the little girl that would have had him wrapped around her little finger. I missed him. But I held it together and tried to make everybody happy and then I went to look at the garden and saw that the biggest and prettiest potted plant had wilted into a pathetic mess and so I pulled it up and slung it into a pot and brought it inside and sat on the kitchen floor and cried and cried over dying flowers but not really about the flowers at all. And then Josh walked in while I was crying over pink flowers and tried to think of every way to help the flowers and was so adorably giving botanical conjectures and his compassion and the tears cleansed me. And the day ended with a happy little girl busy in her secret pink garden.

to Ella

To my Bella girl who today turns 4:
You are my little shadow. You are somewhat quiet and don't demand a lot of attention but you love to be doing whatever I'm doing. As soon as I start to cook, you pull up a chair, you even like to help me clean. You love to feel like you have a job. You love to play in the dirt and every evening you are by my side to help in the garden, watering, pruning and you've perfected your own technique of finding clover blossoms and dandelions and carefully picking them and replanting them in all mommy's planters. You also love to play mommy to Naya and it melts me to see you pull her onto your lap and read to her since she is about the same size as you. You love to draw and paint and are very meticulous about it. Lately your thing is rabbits. I find them drawn on everything.
You are my most content one,you often quietly rattle off your favorite books to yourself. You've memorized them, even the intonations of my voice. You have some mad rhythm skills and for along time have beat boxed songs instead of singing the words which never ceases to crack up your daddy and me.You are very tender hearted and sensitive. You get hurt feelings easily but you forgive quickly. Lately, you are afraid of the dark so we hung fairy lanterns and butterfly lights in your room but the other night we found you nestled up next to Juden. He is very protective of you. You love music and are super girly. You're all about pink, tutus, dressing up, nail polish, and shoes...Lord have mercy, shoes. You would like to be doctor or a princess when you grow up; either would be fine with me. You are changing everyday and sometimes I wonder where this little bug went...

You like to have your goldeny hair done all different ways and are leaving all your toddlerness behind. Your smile really does light up the room just like your laugh. You are delightful in every sense of the word and I am so thankful for every day I get to me your mama. Happy birthday my big girl.

blooms and sparklers and summer

I love how summer sometimes feels like one extended weekend. It's official their heads have lifted from the dirt. I watched the seeds form sprouts and then buds and now blooms and it's one of my favorite times of the day walking around inspecting the constant changes. The garden is lush and bursting with color and it's amazing how happy it makes me. But I'll post more about that later. I love the long sunny days and I feel myself letting some things go to drink in summer, for fear if I blink it will be over. Why does it feel like this endless world of possibility when you're little?




These summer days have spawned a very lax bed time which I'm okay with sometimes and sometimes I am definitely not okay with. This night we got all the kids tucked in and decided to sit outside and have some wine and chat while the stars came out. Josh started doing some sparkler tricks which got Juden's attention as he'd been peeking down at us from his bedroom window. Seconds later they were bursting through the screen door. "Their dropping stars on us", Ella said through giggles.

around the world with meadow

Today my niece Meadow Eve turned 8.

So this beautiful sister set out to make her around-the-world birthday party wishes come true.

They each decorated these suitcases...

and got their passports stamped by this little Dove-bird.

Then off to a golden bamboo forest in China to a table laid with rice cookies, Litchi candies, fans and fortune cookies.


They tried to learn how to use chopsticks...

and had an origami lesson.





They proceeded to Africa and played African drums..

and learned African dance steps.

They traveled to a vineyard in France and had French sparkling lemonade and did their own fashion designs.

They visited South America and a few other countries before ending up back in the USA for some cake in the shape of a globe. It was so lovely to see how with a little attention to detail and a lot of imagination these little girls were taken all over the world without leaving their garden,

a day that Meadow will not soon forget.